Forgiveness

Let me start by saying that this is something I've been personally struggling with. Forgiving those who have wounded us can be extremely difficult. Giving to others, fasting, patiently listening even when we would rather tune out -- these all require concrete actions on our part. We either do these things or we don't, but it's easy to see if we've done them. I think that makes them easier to do. Forgiveness, though, is internal and less visible. It requires us to give up something we value a lot in our society -- our free will. We're giving up an emotion that we usually feel we have a right to. If someone cheats us, steals from us, or slights us in some way, we want revenge, and we feel entitled to it.

Make no mistake -- God respects our free will. He doesn't dispute our right to our feelings. But if we hold on to hatred, there's just not enough room in our hearts for Christ as well. As with all sin, when it comes in contact with God, the result is death. He is Truth and Goodness, and so he just can't be mixed with Sin and Darkness. When He took our sins upon Himself on the Cross, he didn't just take the blame for our sins. His death and resurrection weren't just big symbols to make His cosmic point. It was a spectacular supernatural event that changed history forever. Sin and Death were conquered. When we allow anger to fester, it can feel like poison inside of us. If we hold on to our hatred and allow it to be a part of us, then we die along with it. Letting go of that sin is called conversion, and we're called to it daily.

But we -- especially men -- can feel like real chumps for forgiving others. After all, didn't Christ get angry and drive the money-changers out of the Temple? He did do that. He put things right. He wasn't passive in the face of evil. He faced it head on. At the same time, he was valiant in his acceptance of unjust persecution and condemnation. His conviction and sentencing were a farce. Isn't that a paradox? A contradiction? Why didn't He stand up for Himself?

Because He wasn't thinking about Himself at all. He was thinking about us. He wasn't thinking about Himself and His worship experience when He cleansed the temple. He didn't go on to give all the money-changers black eyes. When Simon Peter struck the ear of the servant, He healed the servant who was there to persecute Him. He loved unconditionally. In our society, we think of those kinds of people as saps. The truth, is, though, that those people are not just the most holy. Psychologists tell us that they are the happiest among us.

Love is difficult because it requires that we trust that there is something good in the other person, even if we can't see it right now. Trust, when we've been hurt, requires forgiveness. That goes against our nature. And yet, there was no one more loving, more faithful, more forgiving than Jesus Christ. He wasn't a fool or a sucker. In fact, He saw what we can't see, which is the image of God in us. If He, who knows us better than we know ourselves, can forgive us, then we need to be willing to forgive each other.